yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
She announced her abortion via fbk
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
