I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
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