Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
