Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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