dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
