better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
