bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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