So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
