She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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