I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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