Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Porn is love you can see.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Randomize
