i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
