That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
You pole danced in your parka.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
