Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize