HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
