I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
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