i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize