Do you still have your period?
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
