the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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