it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
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