i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
