gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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