there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
