he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
