the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
...so i touched it.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
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