I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
