Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Randomize
