I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
