brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Randomize
