D3 body, D1 cock
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
