Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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