I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize