omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Its about making memories worth repressing
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Randomize
