hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
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