Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
