forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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