bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
