I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
