sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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