just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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