writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
