gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I understand Curling. That high.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Randomize
