Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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