there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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