We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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