so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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