when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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