I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
We're too hungover to prance.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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