I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I just gift wrapped bread.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
