Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
