Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
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